This was taken outiside a fitness club. You can’t see it but the geese and I are watching people swiming in a pool. All three of us are thinking we should fly south.
Sitting Zazen for Extended Practice
It is really easy for me to be seduced by the couch and practice is one of the things that I can build up a lot of resistance to even though I have been doing it for a long time. I have so many examples of how much I benefit and it’s even better when I can have the company of other people sitting. So I was glad when I had the opportunity to sit a three day Sesshin lately with Oak Tree in the Garden. And yet even as I was preparing to head out I was thinking of excuses for cancelling at the last moment. (wtf?)
We are often encouraged to indulge by advertising: to eat what doesn’t satisfy any nutritional need, to buy what serves no purpose, to want what we can’t afford now and even when experience shows us these things lead to despair that *ping* in our brain that happens when we follow an urge feels like satisfaction. I watched a show on the science of fast food; apparently the “stomach share” is how fast food companies look at us. It was frightening. The worst thing was I started craving junk food while watching the show! I know it is fun to commiserate with others about our favorite snack food and how we are “going without”. We know it is ridiculous in our part of the world to do something like that. The only real “problem” of food is the lack of it and it still is in many places in the world.
So why is it so hard to do what makes us really feel better? Is it really a corporate master plan to ruin us?
It helps to understand the success of marketing when trying to change behaviour. We do have to be a bit of a bore to pursue practice and to make change happen. When confronted with the onslaught of advertising that encourages instant gratification, heck it makes it seem like a virtue, well, it helps to commit to practice for change.
It also helps to practice. Establishing good habits may not sound like fun but it really makes more fun possible. The other problem is that we have been convinced of a lack of time. I am happy to say I have been reminded what a difference a day makes, or recently, three days. 😛
“OVER 2500 YEARS OF CUSTOMER SERVICE, THE GOLD BUDDHA AWARD FOR SESSATION OF CRAVING, COUNTLESS BEINGS SERVED. GET YOUR SLICE OF CUSHION NOW! RIGHT NOW. REALLY NOW. THIS IS BIG, BIG REALLY REALLY F-ING BIG!!!!”
I have been technology challenged for about ten years. Before that I felt I could hold my own. Now, age, concussion and recently, ambivalence have led me to the shoals, the place where many older adults find themselves, muttering and cursing and occasionally exclaiming “YuReeek Ha!” as some colourful object washes onto our shoal and makes us happy.
I spent an entire weekend, possibly the nicest weekend of the summer trying to sort out why I could not longer watch television (Star Trek) or googly or putz on the various devices in my home! I must say here, if you are patient with the poor techies they are appreciative. I may not be able to defuse racist Nazis but my Zen practice has taught me to be attentive and patient while on hold.
Mostly I want to have Star Trek, any version, playing while I do my sewing. I could put on the radio but sometimes (gottalovem) CBC radio is just dumb and my stitches get tight while my mind boggles. (Star Trek is often dumb but it is Sci-fi, come on!)
Last night while falling asleep I realized my dreams were of a billion tiny flowers, each providing a context for perpetually opening complexity, which viewed as a whole was breathtaking. From my perspective they were the flowers of a quilt that I painstakingly was appliqueing one at a time, made of billions of threads of cotton, manufactured and dyed, all by human hands from plants grown in sunlight and with water and tended by more human hands on a beautiful planet spinning within spinning galaxies.
So as glitchy as these entertainments are from my point of view, some things, important and awesome, never change. 🙂
I prefer to visit houses that have animals or children in them, of course humans too, this means I might get a hot beverage. This weekend I was reunited with my brother’s cohabiters. We bonded. But I didn’t feed them so it was brief. Spanning pan dimensions requires the intake of lots of fuel after all (and naps, preferably in the sun) so they aren’t being rude when they ask for food, just expedient.
I am at a crossroads in the my life so what do I do? I get a job as a crossing guard.
Thursday I get my I.D. badge etc. I am confident and have the a.o.k. from the neurologist. No migraine in three months (a first in my lifetime). I need the income and the city needs crossing guards. It will mean covering a whole division but it is in my daughters area so if I need a pit stop I won’t have to come all the way home. It’s a better area than where I live. I live in the place where there is largely inadequate transit, and really long distances between libraries, coffee shops and places where one can hang out between shifts, important on those cold winter days.
I am looking forward to it. I can bring my hand sewing with me and work on it in between morning, noon and afterschool shifts. I am doing a lot of applique stuff right now.
I get training but in the meantime I am practicing in front of the mirror.
No excuses. Well, I might have a migraine coming because just the way that sentence sounds makes me giggle. Inappropriate giggling is one of the signs of impending migraine and also why I don’t drink wine.
And, yes I have to read everything I write out loud, or moving my lips. I have always done this. It is particularly difficult when I have never heard a certain word pronounced out loud but have read it often. I read a lot. But I don’t read particularly well.
Perhaps you now understand why I am re-blogging my blog. https://quiltingismyaddiction.wordpress.com
Okay it is funny. Just switch the first letter or first two letters of blogging and blog with a different letter…never mind. I can’t seem to link to it. Oh well, you can see a bit of what I am up to, if you care to visit my other site, now that my brain is totally addled. 🙂
Unfortunately, on the days I am not dizzy I am too busy catching up on the things I can’t do when I am. (not)
Oddly, I can blog when I am dizzier than a drunken sailor. Go Figure.