I think I was talking about my concussion,

…meanwhile I am so dizzy and this is my day: sit down, think of something I need, get up to get it, start something else forget what I got up for, sit down and remember what it was, get up and get distracted…spin and repeat. After years of looking after my mother while she was in a similar state I am now in that state myself!  I feel like I am fighting through mashed potatoes.

finding myself waiting for a bus in the heat and the sun (the bus shack is like a solar cooker, what is the point of a clear roof?) A nice young woman said she would let me know when the bus came so I could stand in the door of the Egg Smart restaurant.  By that time my head was throbbing and I thought I’d throw up…the medication I am taking is not really helping, I feel like I am reduced to waiting for the moment the yogurt will expire

not original

I don’t see the neurologist again for two months.  The thing about seeing a neurologist is, how do you really know what she has said if you are brain impaired? A friend cut out an article for me about post concussion syndrome.  I feel like I should just carry it around with me as my saying, “I have a concussion” gets no real response other than “Yeah eh, but you look good, your nose is really healing…”  I cut my bangs so you can’t see the lump that is still on my forehead.

This concussion, like with migraine, makes it so I can’t gage my affect.  Am I too loud, too urgent too hysterical or have I over compensated too much until I am whispering, calm to the point of coma, and sitting in a burning house?

Avoid parties, bureaucrats, people with agendas, opinions, and or grievances,  real or imagined, sunlight, heat and humidity, the urge to buy dresses…

Is it an affront that I am asked to get my photo ID for OHIP and told if I don’t my doctor’s assistant won’t book an appointment for me?  How useful will the photo be when I won’t have bandages on my broken nose forever?  Am a reasonable to not want to listen to my doctor talk about how difficult OHIP is making it for her and then tell me that despite the fact that I am crying she has a lot of other people to see and there is no time to discuss what I am upset about?  Or is it my brain?

Is it my brain?

I want to spend all my time with my grandson and his dog. They seem to be the only people who do not confound me.   😛

Okay, Seriously?

Are adults really afraid of clowns?  I heard two people talking about it on the radio and one said she wouldn’t attend an event because there were going to be clowns there.

In the words of Franklin D. Roosevelt, “We have nothing to fear but fear itself“.

Like in the game “Peek a Boo”  a child learns that life is layered and there can be delight in surprises.

We strive to take good care of our children not show them that life is full of danger and requires our cautious vigilance, but so they are safe and can learn to be fearless as they grow in skill and understanding.  What example do we set, when we, so large and strong in their estimation, allow ourselves to be frightened by clown?

Or we can call on Roosevelt Franklin.  A hero, for sure!

throwback thursday

clowns I used to volunteer as a clown for fundraisers.  This was to raise money for assisted living and group homes for people coping with mental illness.  I painted faces all day, it was so fun.

I learned that a little grease paint can go a long way. It changes how others see you and respond to you and It can change how we see others.

The first thing to note when diffusing the “us and them” bias is to recognize what is superficial and how we let it misinform us. A lot humour comes  from realizing something that we might have feared is just our own reflection!

I am Seriously NOT Clowning Around!


What a great costume

  What a great costume

I really do not have a funny bone any more.  I am going back into hibernation.  Wake me when the weather improves.

but I’m giving you something I took off the internets…sometimes fashion and Sci-fi do a smash up, What? 


You can read all about it here.